Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Do Not Live By Boundaries, Do Not Lose Boundaries, But By All Means, Change Them

Bringing back personal boundaries is many times a difficult thing to do. Simply realizing that the boundary exists at all is many times the first step. Realizing boundaries, is similar to a newborn baby who reaches for air, trying to reach for something that no one else sees. The baby must realize the boundary of its own body and so it is, as we get older. With every boundary broken we are that newborn baby reaching for air. Find your boundaries for yourself but do not let yourself go completely. Remember: discipline. Take your own advice; listen to your words, your heart and your mind. Speak and listen. Know that you have the power to decide what your boundaries will be. Give yourself confidence by redefining your thoughts, your boundaries and you will grow in so many ways.

The boundaries that we find are the boundaries that define who we are. Define your self by your own boundaries, but always keep them malleable. Do not become that which defines you, but define the boundaries that you yourself choose. There are always those that try to set your boundaries by their definitions, but these are fools who have not defined their own boundaries. Watch your boundaries change as you learn. Use your boundaries to understand the world around you, but most importantly yourself.


  1. skye, that is a most interesting piece!

    be steadfast but willing to change, be true but willing to bend.

    It is all a balancing act, really it is.

  2. Thank you Penny!

    Isn't that exactly what life is, a balancing act?

  3. skye: wanted to wish you a happy mother's day, I hope you do not have to work too hard, and the kids show some appreciation.

    motherhood is a truly difficult job.

  4. Thank you Penny, I hope Mother's Day was kind to you as well.

    I didn't work any harder yesterday than I do on any other day I have off from work, so saying I did my usual household chores :)

    The only real difference was in that Becca made me toast for breakfast and gave me a couple of cards she made.

    How did your Mother's Day go?

  5. ah, that was nice!
    Mine was busy, of to see granny, then mom, them mominlaw.

    My one and only lives to far away, which always leaves me a little sad.
    But, what can one do?
    Kids do what they do.

    We talked on the phone.

    But, I did have souvlaki for supper, Yum.
    and a piece of baklava.
    Another one of my faves.
    It was a good day.

  6. Mothers days suck, there should be more fathers days, Yep thats the tickit.

  7. Oh Yummy Penny! I love Souvlaki and Baklava! Now you've gone and made me hungry for I'm glad you had a decent day :)

    Very funny Silv, more hallmark holidays, just what we need to forget reality, right!?!

  8. Boundaries, an interesting topic, Skye. I like your musings on them, especially at this point in my life when I am (yet again!) questioning them. We make our own, yes. We enclose ourselves in fences of our own choosing.

  9. Thank you, lscollison, and welcome to my blogging home!

  10. you are so ZEN! Believe it or not, humor aside, i totally get ya sistah! Your blog brings me balance, thanks Skye!! PS have you ever read The 4 agreements and the other books? I also was into The Stillness of the Heart series but i forget the author's name

  11. No Survey, I haven't had the opportunity to read those yet, but I'll look into them and see if the local library doesn't have them. If they do, then I'll borrow them and see what they're like. First though, I have to read the last 23 books I recently bought at the local book fair :)

  12. Others try to tell me about my boundaries, funny enough, quite often they say they are none where I see them... And yet, I know myself.

    Children sometimes surprise me, showing they know how far they can go although I felt they didn't. I'm glad they prove me wrong sometimes!

    And again, balancing things, including boundaries, indeed is what life is about - especially raising kids.

    I'd like them to know they can achieve so much (sky is the limit). And also - they must not do everything just because they can. Too many people do that.

    BTW: that verse on your blog made me think there's nothing new over and over again when I stopped by... too bad I have never looked lower before...

  13. Thanks for mentioning that about the poem Minka, I'll move it down to the bottom of the page so that people can see if there is something new or not. I hadn't realized that it appeared as nothing new to visitors :)

    As for not having looked lower before, well no worries my Dear, feel free to puruse all you want whereever you wish. It's all there for the reading!

    Yes, the sky is the limit in setting personal boundaries for achievement. I just hope I'm getting this point across with Becca. From the sounds of things with your blog, you certainly have succeeded with this and your children :)

  14. Oh, no! There is no such thing as succeeding in general. There is only one point at the time, only the child(ren) you're dealing with and the result is usually unknown or only vaguely determined. Firstly, you cannot always rely on words, and secondly, they might change their minds. Besides, you never know what would happen without you. And I'm aware we should deal with so many problems that remain unsolved. Or issues if you want. But that's just how it is.

  15. btw, the postcard is still waiting and you were going in a good direction

  16. Very good point Minka! You're absolutely right, success is only a momentary general thing really. After all, people do change when different ideas are introduced to them. :)

    Hmmm I was going in a good direction, huh!?! Interesting seeing as I was going in 2 very distinctly different I'll be right over to check out your comment to me there!


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