Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Perhaps what everyone wants is respect, but nothing comes free!

The cost-benefit rule of thumb: anything may be possible, but nothing comes free. New cars, money, power, prestige, titles; the American dream to have; all of this has its cost, and the cost is not only monetary. These things come at a cost of our priorities, our perspectives of life, and the meaning that we give to our world. “Sometimes, we get lost, and try to live at any cost, but get nothing back for what we paid.” goes an old song lyric. What it expresses is that sometimes we search for meaning, for reason, for respect, love, and admiration in external things, in how others perceive us. These things: the new cars, money, or the aesthetic lifestyle, the spiritual, intellectual quest etc… are suppose to somehow guarantee us others respect and admiration. We work hard at acquiring these things, and are so surprised when others simply respond haphazardly or indifferently. To respect is one thing; to expect is another.

On the other hand, so often we are asked to respect someone, or something, but we cannot seem to see a reason for it. We are simply required to give our respect to everything, to everyone because they exist, or they have achieved something, or perhaps nothing at all; they are merely present; they are there in front of us. We are expected to respect because we have a relationship to or with it, or them. It seems to the world that each of us has a born right to be respected regardless of what, why, or how we are. Many times money seems to be a ground for admiration and respect. If you have it, you are to be respected and revered. Position seems to require that everyone under the certain title is a minion to its every whim, wish, need, and want without question. The powerful are to be respected for their power, and the needy are to be respected for their need. We see people with money, power, position, and fame and we see the attention, and the “respect” they achieve for the things that they have, or have accomplished, and we want that for ourselves: all that they have, and the respect as well. We want the things to give us the respect that we believe we deserve. Many times the act of being poor, a victim of circumstance, or society; self-inflicted lifestyles, belief systems, or lack of, demands respect from us without question, or comment. We are victims of evils beyond our control, or of society; we belong to an accepted group with a long lineage of altruistic ideals. To make matters worse, all of this, and more, is bought and sold; taught as well, to be the ultimate goal in life. But to be respected, one must deserve respect.

Everything has a cost, but the cost is not always what we think it is. To be respected is to have respect for yourself not for what you have, who you think that you are, or whom you know. To be admired is to admire yourself for who you are not for what you have achieved, where you have been, how much you have. Many times the material things that we surround ourselves with are only a fa├žade that attracts people, like honey attracts flies. They may not care for you, but they see you for what they perceive themselves to want: the things that you have acquired. To decide upon a lifestyle for yourself is to take the responsibilities of that lifestyle for your own, but be sure to understand what those are, and what they mean. The truth is very often something extremely different than what we perceive it to be at first glance. So be sure to know what is being paid for before you lay your payment down, and be assured that there will be a payment, due upon receipt.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

More Flowers, Are You Sick Of Them Yet?

Well everything but the Lily's in the North Garden are done blooming now, and they've only just got buds on them! So saying there will be a pic of them when they open up :) Just so you know, all my pics should be clickable for enlarging should you be interested!

The rest of these are more pics of the flowers in the south beds as well as my mint patch which I hadn't taken pictures of up till now. The patch doesn't look so pretty at the moment, after taking the pic Silv when and cut them all down. Whoohoo, now I have fresh mint leaves for tea, yay, I do love fresh mint tea!


Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I have gnomes running around my gardens. Trouble is, as soon as they realize you're looking at them, they freeze. I've never been able to get an actual action shot of them, oh well, perhaps next time *shrugs shoulders*


Last year I only had one bloom on my peonies bush, lucky me, this year I have two! Sorry for the blurry photos though guys, don't know what's wrong with me to take such icky pic's :(


Ah Poppies, lovely flowers. Not a perennial, true, but they sure do reseed themselves from year to year! This one just decided to come up in this bed on it's own this year. Up till now I've only had them along my fence line further south than this particular bed is. Soon I'll have some pics of the actual Poppy Bed which also has some Virginia Creeper in it.

Yep, that's my rain barrel peeking out from behind the Lily's alright! As for the Lily's, well, I know, I took the pic after the first blooms were already done. But no worries, I still have 2 or 3 other kinds of Lily's that need to bloom, they're all budding now, so it shouldn't take much longer for them!


Ah yes, the Day Lily's, a new bloom every day. Sadly they only last a day, but at least there's always at least one fresh bloom all summer long! Yep, another little Gnome, kinda cute though, don't ya think?


Have you ever seen Geraniums like this? I never have prior to my mom's having given them to me. They bloom all summer and are really quite pretty. Trouble is, these things don't quit, I mean, once they start blooming, they take over the whole yard! I have 2 that I want to keep, they lie on either side of the Poppy Bed, this one is to the left and to the left of it is the mint patch. To the right of the other one, is the corner bed where there are a bunch of Day Lily's that have bloomed today for the first time as well as the Peonies and some Irises that haven't bloomed yet. Oh yes, I can't forget all the Pansies aka Johnny Jump-Up's that are in that corner bed along with being in the bed up against the south wall of my house!

Saturday, June 13, 2009

More flower pics for those that enjoy them :)

First up, we have the Columbine that were only budding in the last post, now they're in full bloom and down-right beautiful if you ask me! I love the color, too bad the pic doesn't do them justice.

Here we now have the garden on the north side (front) of my house. As you can see the Lily-of-the-Valley are budding and will be blooming soon. Eventually we'll see just how much I'll regret planting them as I am mildly allergic to them...oops, oh well...lol


Now for one of my Ferns. I have a couple more, but this one is the nicer looking of them. I know they don't bloom, but they do round out the flowerbed quite nicely.


Last but not least, we have my Anemonies. These have such pretty delicate white bell flowers, I can't wait till they all start to bloom, right now only the one bud has opened though!


Oh yes, can't forget this pic with the beautiful silky red Lily's in the background. Too bad these won't be blooming till late summer early fall, they are the cream of the crop for this bed of flowers I have to admit! :)

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Spring Has Finally Sprung

Quite a while back I had said to a few people that I would put in a post about my flower beds. Finally I have some pics of new flowers that I can indeed post! These flowers are just a few of what will be in bloom in the next few months, but are all that are or have bloomed so far this spring in my flower bed close to my house. I have a couple other beds that are showing signs of growth, but no blooms yet, I'm eagerly anticipating the arrival of flowers over my whole yard!

Without any further delay's, I give you the few flowers that I have!

First are the Tulips, they're all done now, but being the first harbingers of spring flowers, they're always a welcome sight!


Once the Tulips are all said and done, the smaller of the Irises start. This batch is planted in my basement window box right beside the Tulips and are always the first of the Irises to bloom, soon will come some burgandy colored ones and then later in summer I'll have some white and perhaps yellow Irises to show you!


Then there are the Bleeding Hearts. I love the way these look! Theoretically they should have blooms well into summer, I'm not sure if they will or not, I just planted this bush last year. Here's hoping for a lot of lovely heart shaped flowers!

Last but certainly not least, the Colombine. No they haven't bloomed yet, and I'm not sure how long it will take for them to open, but they have some nice buds on them! These too I only acquired last year, so I'm not even sure what color they are, doesn't really matter, I'm sure they'll be quite pretty :)


I've never claimed to be any good at photography, and well, you can tell by these pictures, can't ya!?! In my defense, it was such a nice sunny day when I took these pics that I couldn't see the display on the camera, so I had no idea what it was that I was taking pictures of. All I knew for sure was that the flowers I wanted is where I had the camera pointed...lol

Monday, May 18, 2009

Change is the only consistent

To grow, to broaden perspectives, is a process. It is a slow, tedious journey that one must take one step at a time. It entails time, tools, and persistence. It is life itself. It is understanding. The process begins in the guise of curiosity for the unknown and the need to know. To contemplate in our own mind what knowledge our curiosity dredges up out of life and to make decisions within the scope of our own perspectives. With time and patience will come understanding of what we are looking for, what we need for our own heart and mind. We will grow and become more aware of our perspectives and how we can broaden them. To obtain knowledge of life and ourselves is to be able to realize goals in order to prolong and broaden understanding and ultimately broaden our perspectives.

Awareness is the awakening of the need for change, the want for growth. Awareness comes with searching and not settling upon answers as the truth. 

Realization is the first step. To realize a need or want for change is the door that opens up to the nothingness that faces us all, the blank slate, and the white piece of paper.

Decision is the next step. To make the choice to step out into an abyss and to fall. Decisions about truth, perspectives are most times not easy and remember, no one is forced to make them. To find yourself faced with decision is to find yourself faced with change. To realize that change is the only consistent truth is to broaden your perspectives.

Understanding is seeing that truth is change that it exists only within the realms of perspective; that what we become aware of is our perspectives, our limited fields of vision themselves.

Persistence drives us onward through our lives and leads us to learning, accepting the unknown with the purpose of knowing and using that knowledge for the purpose of learning.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Do Not Live By Boundaries, Do Not Lose Boundaries, But By All Means, Change Them

Bringing back personal boundaries is many times a difficult thing to do. Simply realizing that the boundary exists at all is many times the first step. Realizing boundaries, is similar to a newborn baby who reaches for air, trying to reach for something that no one else sees. The baby must realize the boundary of its own body and so it is, as we get older. With every boundary broken we are that newborn baby reaching for air. Find your boundaries for yourself but do not let yourself go completely. Remember: discipline. Take your own advice; listen to your words, your heart and your mind. Speak and listen. Know that you have the power to decide what your boundaries will be. Give yourself confidence by redefining your thoughts, your boundaries and you will grow in so many ways.

The boundaries that we find are the boundaries that define who we are. Define your self by your own boundaries, but always keep them malleable. Do not become that which defines you, but define the boundaries that you yourself choose. There are always those that try to set your boundaries by their definitions, but these are fools who have not defined their own boundaries. Watch your boundaries change as you learn. Use your boundaries to understand the world around you, but most importantly yourself.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Governments

Governments, if they endure, always tend increasingly toward aristocratic forms. No government in history has been known to evade this pattern. And as the aristocracy develops, government tends more and more to act exclusively in the interests of the ruling class-whether that class be hereditary royalty or entrenched bureaucracy.

A large populace held in check by a small but powerful force is quite a common situation. And we know the major conditions wherein this large populace may turn upon its keepers.

One: When they find a leader. This is the most volatile threat to the powerful; they must retain control of leaders.

Two: When the populace recognizes its chains. Keep the populace blind and unquestioning.

Three: When the populace perceives a hope of escape from bondage. They must never even believe that escape is possible!

Liberal bigots are the ones who trouble me most. I distrust the extremes. Scratch a conservative and you find someone who prefers the past over any future. Scratch a liberal and find a closet aristocrat. It's true! Liberal governments always develop into aristocracies. The bureaucracies betray the true intent of people who form such governments. Right from the first, the little people who formed the governments which promised to equalize the social burdens found themselves suddenly in the hands of bureaucratic aristocracies. Of course, all bureaucracies follow this pattern, but what a hypocrisy to find this even under a communized banner. Ahhh, well, if patterns teach me anything it's that patterns are repeated.

You know, police always observe that criminals prosper. It takes a pretty dull policeman to miss the fact that the position of authority is the most prosperous criminal position available. Prisons and police and legalities, the perfect illusion behind which a prosperous power structure can operate while observing, quite accurately, that it is above it's own laws.

So what is a good type of government? I really don't know. All I know is that nothing tried so far seems to truly work in the long run, and that history repeats itself entirely too often, because no one wants to learn from past mistakes.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Think about it!

Open your mind to the world and you open up a whole new world with every turn. The world seems big, beyond our control, wild and dangerous, and quite honestly: it is. That is the nature of the world as it is. To say otherwise is only wishful thinking. Nevertheless, to lock ourselves in a house, burying our heads in the sand is not living in the world, in fact, it is not living at all. Life is chance. To live, chances must be taken. Take chance seriously: but take it. We can lie to ourselves about the world, we can pretend that it is merely a stepping stone to a better place but these feats of faith are only that: feats of faith. The mind that accepts the world through action accepts life as it happens. Such a mind is in the position to change the world around it. Change is the power behind awareness.

There is a human dilemma. That dilemma is the fact that fear often is the driving force in life and not awareness. We, as human beings, have the chance to face change eye to eye. Many times even though the opportunity presents itself, it is not always taken. There are those who choose to turn a blind eye and define the world as they would want it to be instead of what they are aware of. Truth becomes a subjective definition, their definition, or an accepted one, either being as absurd as the other. Those minds which choose to see the world as they would want it instead of how it is are a hindrance to those seeking the truth as it is portrayed, moment by moment through awareness. The truth as it unfolds in the mind. Wishful thinking too many times turns to obstinate faith, which is nothing but a highway to hellish dogma. 

It is the right of any individual to believe as they see fit. It is not the right of those individuals to force their particular brand of faith on the world just to cement their claims to truth. If their mind is to be rendered useless by fear or wishful thinking then let that mind die in peace and solitude without dragging the rest of humanity down with it. It is only a hindrance to those around it and a detriment to everyone.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Breastfeeding in Public


I received an e-mail from a friend about breastfeeding. She asked me several questions, among them, were you a breastfed baby, did you breastfeed and if so for how long, and, did you have trouble with comments when you breastfed in public? One other question she asked was, “What do you think about mothers’ breastfeeding babies in public, as long as they are covered up?”

That last question is the one I want to discuss here, but first, this part of my answer. "I was breastfed as a baby, and I breastfed all 3 of my kids, it never hurt with any of them. As for breastfeeding in public, I'm all for it, and no a woman shouldn't have to cover up. Do you cover up your face when eating in public? Does anyone you know do that? If the answer is no to both questions, why on earth should a woman cover up to feed her child?"

That part of my answer pretty much sums up where I want this post to go. What I would really like to know, is why something so natural as breastfeeding is so frowned upon in public by society? Women have breasts so they can feed their children just like every other mammal on the planet it's natural. Do you hide your face when you see your pet cat feeding her kittens? Or your pet dog feeding her pups? What do you do, when you're driving down the road and pass a farm where a cow is feeding her calf or a mare her foal? Do you get all ashamed, and say "That's not right, they should go hide somewhere to feed their young!" No you don't, and why don't you? Because breastfeeding is natural, that's why! So why do so many say that women have to be covered up, that it's not right for humans to feed or be fed in public? Do people not realize just how hot and uncomfortable it is to have a child tucked up to your breast under a blanket? I don't care how light the blanket is, babies generate an awful lot of heat. Besides that, when you have your head under a blanket, would you be comfortable eating? No, you wouldn't be, nor would I!

I've seen women breastfeeding in public without being covered up, and I wanted to cheer. It really hurt me, when I'd hear other people walking past her saying she should go home to feed the kid. There was one time that I heard that when I did get on my soapbox as I'm doing right now. This couple walked past a woman feeding her child in the mall while she was sitting at a table having her own lunch. The husband (of said couple) took one look at the woman eating and feeding her babe, and said "What the hell do you think you're doing? This is a public place and children can see you! You should be ashamed of yourself showing your breast off to everyone who walks by! And if you aren't, you must be a slut to not care!"

I was absolutely horrified by that mans behavior! I couldn't believe my ears, that someone should be so vile as to say such things! Damn rights I got on my soap box that day! Most of what I said to him, I said here already, but I also asked him what he would do if his wife had a newborn babe, and needed to feed the child while shopping. Before I let him say anything, I also asked him what gave him the right to call this total stranger a slut, for doing the most natural thing in the world? All of this, I said loudly enough so that most of the people in the food court could hear me. The man turned beat red, I don't know if it was from embarrassment or anger, and turned around to leave. He never offered an apology to the woman though, and that is a sad thing. He could have at least done that. His wife certainly looked completely mortified from the moment her husband opened his mouth, at least someone in that couple had some brains, sheesh!

There was a smattering of applause for the tongue-lashing I gave the man, and the woman feeding her babe looked up at me with tears in her eyes and said thank you. I was about 4 months pregnant with my son at the time, and let me tell you, you don't want to mess with a pregnant, overly hormonal woman! 

I'll never forget that day, it was a couple of weeks before Christmas, and I just couldn't believe the uncharitable attitude that some people have. I know that, for all the people who think like I do, there are that many more that think like the man who criticized the woman. 

Society needs to change.

*shakes head sadly while climbing off the soapbox*

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Take What Is Your Life and ask the simple question, Why!?!


Passion for living, learning, passion in itself, a necessity of life, for without passion what are we, but processes and algorithms that procure nothing, think nothing, create nothing, and feel nothing. Life is a product of evolution, but passion is a product of life, poured through emotion, and tempered with time.

We all must be passionate. Even if we fight it, seclude ourselves from it, hide away, and run from its tendrils and vices. Life without passion is sterile and clean of all the dirt that colors our endeavors, and dreams.

Shaping life to our own wishes, to our idea for what we think it should be, is patient work. It is filled with "should haves", alternative plans, and false goals in unrealistic time frames. It seems a waiting game filled with doubtful moves and guilt for not doing enough. It forces you to choose what is important, to pick priorities, and to analyze validity of choices at every move, never satisfied. Always trying to forget that you have made life a game in which you strive for control.

So, you do what you love wondering if you love what you do. Either you must catch up with life, or live with the knowledge that you never will.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Satan's Hoof Prints

This is my take on the article I found at Jeff Rense about a woman in Devon England who found hoof prints in her back garden. Now anyone in Canada and probably the United States as well, hell probably over most of Europe, can see that the prints in this picture are most likely from deer, what kind of deer would be up for debate, but deer non-the-less. BUT in England, they have scientists saying that they can't be explained! They are, in fact, trying to find out if they were caused by a hare or rabbit hopping on it's hind legs. *insert eye roll here*


Now, I realize that there isn't much snow in Devon, but really, doesn't everyone know that England has deer? Couldn't anybody figure that out? Like really, in 1855 when the "phenomenon" was originally seen, villagers blamed the prints on Satan and the local church for having changed the prayer book. Apparently when you change your style of praying you're inviting Satan to come around for a visit. Yeah right *snigger, snigger, snort*

Have people not actually seen any deer in Devon, ever? Or do deer only show up there every 150 years or so, that their tracks are so unrecognizable? To play devil's advocate here (pardon the sad pun), but if these tracks were indeed made by Satan, are the people there so incredibly holy that there is only a small window of time that Satan can come around and visit them? And if he had come around, where are all the evil things he must have done? After all, Satan is evil, right, so what happenings will be attributed to his appearance? Not a one, according to this article, but I suppose time will tell what people will blame on the appearance of these prints.

Being superstitious has got to be, at the very least, part of the problem with not being able to identify these prints. I find it very interesting that this article was posted on Friday the 13th, 2 days before the Ides Of March (today :D ) and 4 days in total before St. Patrick’s Day. Talk about a superstition festival! What kind of Supernatural Phenomenon will be happening in your neck-of-the-woods this week? If anything does, please tell all!


Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Obama Gives Movies to British Prime Minister!!!

Ok, I hadn't known about this, and probably still wouldn't if I hadn't read a snippet of it in Nikkicrumpet's blog!  But OMG, how can anyone be so gauche?  Pardon the insult to those coming from Alabama, but really, did they find this Obamarama Dingdong in the backwoods there or something?  

Instead of doing a copy-&-paste thing, I'll just put in a link to the actual news article.  An aricle that for obvious reasons won't be printed nor put on the air in North America.  I truly do hope you go and read this!

To my special friend Gordon.

It's no wonder that Nikki said she's has never been so ashamed to be an American!  Over all, the post Nikki had written was incredibly funny, I just found that one snippet of her "I wish..." to be a sad example of the way that Obama is planning on changing America.  It is as plain as the nose on your face America, that it won't be for the good!

Please forgive me if you've been reading about this in too many other blogs, but like I said, I just read a small bit about it, so I  checked into it, and had to spread the word!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Wouldn't you just love to know...

...that if you were to call the fire department, that they'd be able to find your home quickly and without any problems?  I sure would, trouble is, I know that's just not feasible here!

I live in a small town of about 6500 people, with the town itself measuring out to approximately 1.5 square miles. You would think it would be rather difficult to get lost here, what with numbered streets running north and south and named streets going east and west, granted there are a few exceptions to the named streets, with a couple of them running north and south as well.  

Our firedepartment consists of a paid chief who also has a real full time job and roughly 35 volunteers, also all having real jobs outside of being on call 24/7.  Irregardless of the fact that they all work outside of the firedepartment, you would think that the chief at the very least would need to know what streets were where and how to get to the different appartments, homes, row-houses, etc.  Well, he doesn't!  I doubt he's ever studied a map of this town!


Imagine my surprise just a few short months ago.  Silv was here and we were both goofing around on our computers and trying to decide what we wanted to do for supper,  Munchkin (my kid) was at the kitchen table working on some homework.  The dogs started going nuts and I heard someone on the front deck.  Sure enough, when I got up to look, I saw the firechief and one of his croonies on my deck and the first response truck in the parking lot.  I opened the door and asked if I could help them.  The first thing the chief said to me was, "Did you know your doorbell's not working?"  I replied in my typical smartass fashion, "Yeah," says I, "That would be why I have this sign on my door saying 'Doorbell disconnected, Please knock'.".

"Oh," says he, "Well, I was wondering if this is #7-***  ****** Avenue" say's he. "No, it's #7-*** ****** Lane" I reply.

"So, you don't have a fire here?"

"Not that I'm aware of, why?"

"We got a call saying there's a fire at this address"

"Well, it wouldn't be this address if you're looking for #7-*** ****** Ave now would it?"

"No, I suppose it wouldn't be.  You wouldn't happen to know where that address is, would you?"

Ok, the firechief is asking me directions for a street that runs north and south, not named even remotely similiar to the street that I live on which runs east and west.  I looked at him totally confused, like really, I'm supposed to know which apartment building is which?  Isn't that his job?  So I pointed out to him that there are 2 apartment buildings north either of which he could be looking for, or perhaps it's any one of the 3 south of where we were, but seeing as I didn't know anybody living in any one of those apartment complexes, I really couldn't help him much.  I asked him if he knew if he were looking for apartments or row-housing, because that would narrow down his search somewhat.  He said a second floor apartment.  I'm wondering at this point just why exactly he thought that my row-house which has a basement, mainfloor and upstairs would be a second floor apartment.

By now, you can just imagine how confused I am, first off, I get confused easily by people who are not exactly smart. Secondly, I get confused by the fact that government officials would hire such stupid people to keep the community safe. *Insert forhead slap here* DOH! Obviously what I was thinking was an oxy moron!  Government officials are stupid themselves, they wouldn't recognize the stupidity of others, how dumb can I be sometimes!?!

With my confusion somewhat cleared up, I sent the chief on his way.  What else could I do?  I didn't know where the place was that he was looking for, sheesh.  As he turns to walk away, I hear a call come in on his radio. "Chief, where are ya at?  We're at the apartment, nothing serious, just a burnt supper in the oven!"

I closed my door and started to laugh. I laughed so hard that I had tears streaming down my face.  Silv of course asked what that was all about, seeing as he was inside the whole time, while I had carried out this conversation out on my deck.

Wiping tears from my eyes I looked over at Silv, and said "Pray you never have to call the firedepartment!  If they can't find an apartment here in town, there's no way they'll ever be able to find your place out in the country!"

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

More on the Stupidty of the Local Cops


I don't get pulled over or have too many run-in's with the cops, but last summer, I did indeed have a little fun with a couple of them!

It was the end of summer holidays, the last weekend of August.  The town was putting on it's summer festival and things were rather nuts.  At the time I was the breakfast cook for a hotel restaurant, so because of all the extra people and festivities, I had to start work 1.5 hours earlier in the day than normal.

Here I am, groggily on my way to work at 4:15 in the blessed a.m. when I see a cruiser car start to follow me half a block from my home.  About 5 blocks later another cruiser joins the first one.  That's when he flashes his lights and gives his noise maker a short go.  What do I do?  Well the responsible thing of course, I pulled over!  Cop from cruiser #1 comes over and asks for my driver's and registration, which I hand over ever so politely.  He then asks me "So, what are you doing on the road this fine evening?"  I look over to him with a rather dazed expression, I'm sure.  Fine evening?  It's morning, geez!  So I say's to this brilliant fine upstanding young man "It's morning, not evening and I'm on my way to work."

"Yes, well, I'm just finishing my shift, so to me it's still evening, or if you will, night.  It won't be morning for me for several hours yet."  he say's to me.  Yeah, I can understand that, sort of.  Doesn't mean you have to show your stupidity by refusing to acknowledge the time of day!  Continuing, he say's to me, "Well, there is no business open at this time of day, so where are you going?"

Like, really, how dumb can ya get?  "I'm on my way to work, just like I told you, I work in the hotel right across the street.  I was in the process of parking when you pulled me over!" I lower my gaze just enough so I can roll my eyes without him noticing.  

Cop from cruiser #2 comes over. "Got a problem here?" Cop #1 says "She's not being overly cooperative answering my questions, but not much of a problem." Really people, I did answer his questions, and I still don't know why I had been pulled over!

Cop #1 tells Cop #2 all that had been discussed up to that point.  When he's done, I politely interupt saying "Excuse me, but I will be late for work if we don't finish up here soon, can you at least tell me why you pulled me over?"  #1 says  " First I would like to know how you expect to get into a locked hotel" Where's a video camera when you need one?  This should be on Candid Camera or something! "Well officer," says I, "I suppose I would have to use my keys for the building." No reply, no comment, nada, zip, zilch for that comeback of mine.

"Well, do you realize that before I flashed my lights at you, you were going a little less than 40 in a 50 zone?"  Oh geez, I was slowing down to park, no I hadn't realized!  (That's what I should have said, but in fact I said) "Yes, sir, like I told you, I was about to park when you pulled me over.  I was slowing down so that I could!" "Don't get wise with him Miss" Say's #2, that was being wise, and my previous comment wasn't?  Now I rolled my eyes for them to see it, but both missed it, go figure!

#1 was a little pink at this point, "You also failed to use your blinker at your last turn, I do believe that it's not working." "Well officer, being the weekend, there are no repair shops open.  I'll get it looked at as soon as I'm able on Monday, will that be ok?" "That will be fine, consider this a warning though, and I'll check to see that it's been done!"  

"Are you done with me then?  I can get in to work now, right?" "Yes miss," says #1 "That'll be fine." "One more thing first though officer, do you think I could have my drivers and registration back please? I'd hate to be pulled over on my way home and not be able to supply those!" "Oh, yes, yes, I forgot, here!"

With my possessions returned to me, I walk to the hotel, and unlock the door.  As I was walking in, #2 started saying something, but it was lost in my re-locking of the door once I was inside.  I saw him coming towards the hotel, but I ignored him and went to the restaurant door and unlocked it, went in and relocked it.    I heard him bang on the hotel door to get my attention, but I figured that I'd had enough of these clowns and I had been delayed long enough.  I did have work to do after all, so instead of going back outside, I turned on the griddles, got out the bacon, sausages and hashbrowns that needed preping, got out the ingredients I needed to make pancakes and set to work.  I never did get my taillights checked, nor did I ever hear from either of those cops again.

PS

I failed to mention that although #1 had taken my drivers and registration, he hadn't written down a thing.  Not a bit of the information he needed in order to check up on me had been written down, that's probably why #2 had followed me to the hotel and had been trying to get my attention!

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

What We Have Heya, Is A Failya To Communicate!

Technically I should be putting this in my Weekly Injection Of Chuckles blog, but I thought, hey, I've already done my joke for this week there, and I really want to put this post in before I forget again.  Besides, this one's a true story and Chuckles is jokes :D  

There's my excuse, that'll work, sure, and I even got a plug in for my new blog.  Yep, works for me! *said with a wink in an aside not meant for human ears*

Anywho's-it, I have an older sister that is permanently fried on pot.  Yep, she smokes as many joints a day as she does cigarettes, and she smokes upwards of 2 packs a day of those.  Oops, I digress, sorry!

Last summer sitting in her living room, she was telling me about her dealer and how it will be a while before she can get anything from him again.  Silly me, I asked her why.  She comes up with this cock-a-mamey story about him being evicted from his home and until he sets up shop somewhere else, she had to find someone else to supply her with her pot.  Of course I didn't believe her, of course I thought this was just another one of her drug-rattled-brain-bs-stories.  That is until I read about it in the paper the very next day!

Holy Shit, I said to Silv when reading the paper.  She wasn't just too stoned to misunderstand the situation with her dealer!  You've got to read this, the title is "Cops Foiled".  Silv say's "What the f*&^ are you talking about?"

So I start to read to him, "Over the past 6 months the ___ police service had ____ under servaillance, they were hoping for a large drug bust this time.  But due to some miscommunication and a landlord that was sick of the goings on of the home, the man in question was evicted by the sheriffs department before the drug bust could go down.

"The landlord, when interviewed, said that 'The neighbors were complaining about all the people coming and going from the home at all hours of the night, so I gave him an eviction notice which he didn't comply to.  Therefore I had to send a copy of the notice to the sheriffs department and have the forcibly remove him.'

"When questioning the sheriff who enforced the eviction, he said that the police service hadn't informed them about the sting operation and so he had no idea that they were getting ready to arrest the man.

"As it so happened, the sheriff evicted the man the day before the bust.  When the cops showed up and bust in the door to arrest the man in question, they found the home empty, and were at a complete loss as to what went wrong."

Of course that guy left town and moved his opperation elsewhere.  Really, he's not so dumb as to stay in the same small town as where he narrowly avoided getting busted!   I don't rightly know how, but I'm guessing that when he got the initial eviction notice he had started moving his stuff out.  After all, once evicted by the sheriffs, it's not like you can go back and get your stuff.  Not only that, but had he still had all his hydroponic equipment and plants in there, I'm sure the sheriff would have done more than just make him get his sorry ass out of the house.  Irregardless of how it went down, the guy got all his stuff out of the place with neither the sheriff nor the local cops any the wiser.  Now if that guy doesn't have a horseshoe up his butt, I don't know who has.  Talk about lucky!

Thursday, February 26, 2009

A Note From A Child Psychiatrist

By Elizabeth J. Roberts
Sunday, October 8, 2006

I have been treating, educating and caring for children for more than 30 years, half of that time as a child psychiatrist, and the changes I have seen in the practice of child psychiatry are shocking. Psychiatrists are now misdiagnosing and overmedicating children for ordinary defiance and misbehavior. The temper tantrums of belligerent children are increasingly being characterized as psychiatric illnesses.

Using such diagnoses as bipolar disorder, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and Asperger's, doctors are justifying the sedation of difficult kids with powerful psychiatric drugs that may have serious, permanent or even lethal side effects.

There has been a staggering jump in the percentage of children diagnosed with a mental illness and treated with psychiatric medications. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported that in 2002 almost 20 percent of office visits to pediatricians were for psychosocial problems -- eclipsing both asthma and heart disease. That same year the Food and drug Administration reported that some 10.8 million prescriptions were dispensed for children -- they are beginning to outpace the elderly in the consumption of pharmaceuticals. And this year the FDA reported that between 1999 and 2003, 19 children died after taking prescription amphetamines -- the medications used to treat ADHD. These are the same drugs for which the number of prescriptions written rose 500 percent from 1991 to 2000.

Some psychiatrists speculate that this stunning increase in childhood psychiatric disease is entirely due to improved diagnostic techniques. But setting aside the children with legitimate mental illnesses who must have psychiatric medications to function normally, much of the increase in prescribing such medications to kids is due to the widespread use of psychiatric diagnoses to explain away the results of poor parenting practices. According to psychiatrist Jennifer Harris, quoted in the January/February issue of Psychotherapy Networker, "Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than to suggest parenting changes."

Parents and teachers today seem to believe that any boy who wriggles in his seat and willfully defies his teacher's rules has ADHD. Likewise, any child who has a temper tantrum is diagnosed with bipolar disorder. After all, an anger outburst is how most parents define a "mood swing." Contributing to this widespread problem of misdiagnosis is the doctor's willingness to accept, without question, the assessment offered by a parent or teacher.

What was once a somber, heart-wrenching decision for a parent and something children often resisted -- medicating a child's mind -- has now become a widely used technique in parenting a belligerent child. As if they were debating parental locks on the home computer or whether to allow a co-ed sleepover, parents now share notes with each other about whose child is taking what pill for which diagnosis.

These days parents cruise the Internet, take self-administered surveys, diagnose their children and choose a medication before they ever set foot in the psychiatrist's office. If the first doctor doesn't prescribe what you want, the next one will.

There was a time in the profession of child psychiatry when doctors insisted on hours of evaluation of a child before making a diagnosis or prescribing a medication. Today some of my colleagues in psychiatry brag that they can make an initial assessment of a child and write a prescription in less than 20 minutes. Some parents tell me it took their pediatrician only five minutes. Who's the winner in this race?

Unfortunately, when a child is diagnosed with a mental illness, almost everyone benefits. The schools get more state funding for the education of a mentally handicapped student. Teachers have more subdued students in their already overcrowded classrooms. Finally, parents are not forced to examine their poor parenting practices, because they have the perfect excuse: Their child has a chemical imbalance.

The only loser in this equation is the child. It is the child who must endure the side effects of these powerful drugs and be burdened unnecessarily with the label of a mental illness. Medicating a child, based on a misdiagnosis, is a tragic injustice for the child: His or her only advocate is the parent who lacked the courage to apply appropriate discipline.

Well-intentioned but misinformed teachers, parents using the Internet to diagnose their children, and hurried doctors are all a part of the complex system that drives the current practice of misdiagnosing and overmedicating children. The solution lies in the practice of good, conscientious medicine that is careful, thorough and patient-centered.

Parents need to be more careful with whom they entrust their child's mental health care. Doctors need to take the time to understand their pediatric patients better and have the courage to deliver the bad news that sometimes a child's disruptive, aggressive and defiant behavior is due to poor parenting, not to a chemical imbalance such as bipolar disorder or ADHD.

The writer is a child and adolescent psychiatrist in California and the author of "Should You Medicate Your Child's Mind?"

Monday, February 23, 2009

What is Love?

Slow down for three minutes to read this. It is so worth it. Touching words from the mouth of babes. What does Love mean? A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds,

"What does love mean?"


The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:

"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore.

So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."

Rebecca- age 8

"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."

Billy - age 4

"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."

Karl - age 5

"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."

Chrissy - age 6

"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."

Terri - age 4

"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy
and she takes a sip before giving it to him,
to make sure the taste is OK."

Danny - age 7

"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing,
you still want to be together and you talk more.

My Mommy and Daddy are like that.
They look gross when they kiss"

Emily - age 8

"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas, if you stop opening
presents and listen."

Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)

"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who
you hate,"

Nikka - age 6

(we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)

Thursday, February 19, 2009

How Proud Are You Of Your Country?

By George Paxinos
2-18-9
 If we do nothing now, if we do not see the link between what is happening to everyone on the economic front and on the crowded streets of the destitute, lined by clusters of empty shops, between which cower the huddled masses of women and children left homeless and penniless while their menfolk are dragooned off to an oil cartel's "Never-Ending War on 'Terror'" for their corporate fun and profit and for the furtherance of the jackbooted State-Terror of the New World Order's Globalist State-Fascist Agenda, if we cannot make the connection from conditions in our home society to those happening to forgotten individuals held incommunicado on the Dark Side away from the light of life in secret places like Gitzmo, Guantanamo's Camp X-Ray, Abu Ghuraib Torture and Interrogation Camp in Iraq, Bagram Torture Facility in Afghanistan, then not only will we never be able to look ourselves in the mirror again with anything like a clear conscience, but we ourselves, our families and our loved ones, will soon enough land in home-side versions of those same camps. 
  
Read below what America has become, Dick Cheney, a clipped-wing bird-hunter, who approved the crushing of a child's testicles : read here : 
  
"I feel sick to my stomach as I write this. 
  
This morning I read the interview with the former Guantanamo guard who describes in excruciating detail how Gitmo prisoners were allegedly subjected to anal rape as well as other forms of sexual abuse, torture, humiliation, and other atrocities, all at the hands of their U.S. captors, in some cases under the supervision of U.S. medical personnel. It is a ghastly account." 
  
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-seery/cheney-chief-of-churls_b_167451.html 
  
"Dick Cheney -- the clipped-wing bird hunter -- as the poster boy of U.S. sadism. He became the bragging ringleader for policies that exceeded the bounds of respectable military strategy (and/or domestic partisanship) in order to inflict special psychological damage on all perceived adversaries [...] the insistence on waterboarding; the indecent disdain for the Geneva Conventions; the Plamegating of critics; the spying without warrant; the legal approval for squeezing a child's testicles : [...] ... 
  
"In several public fora heretofore, Yoo has insisted that no law -- neither domestic nor international -- prevents the president from authorizing the crushing of a child's testicles or the raping of an infant as a way of exerting pressure upon a terrorist suspect." 
  
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-seery/testicles_b_109687.html 
  
  
Former Gitzmo Guard Tells All : 
http://www.harpers.org/archive/2009/02/hbc-90004409 
  
DOJ Report on Yoo/Bybee Torture Memos 'Damning' : 
http://www.pubrecord.org/torture/687-doj-probe-on-yoo-torture-memos 
  
I am not going to write more regarding America's fate if it does nothing to stop these atrocities, nor about the way America will go down in history as a far, far worse Fascist Regime than Nazi Germany ever was; from now on in, it is up to you to do this -- for yourselves. 
  
Even here in Switzerland I am under observation by obscure security services probably not Swiss for writing articles like this one, I have found two professional bugs planted in my tiny apartment by persons and agencies unknown, and calling Swiss Intelligence and complaining seems to have surprised them as much as it had me : these obscure agencies or persons can most probably only be acting from British or American sources, and they are acting illegally on Swiss Territory, to promulgate the goals of their New World Order against the laws of my new home country, or else there are politicians in our midst who are turncoats and traitors to our country, lapdogs of the NWO, whose only goal, it would appear, is to share in the bloody-handed ghoul-feast of the ultra-rich, be they only small scavenger buzzards, themselves. 
  
I am now a Swiss, and if Switzerland was ever lacking in Wilhelm Tells, if he was indeed only a figment of Schiller's imagination, then at least there is one in this country now. If the New World Order wants a fight, then they have got one. But not by Tell's Second Arrow -- he was a gentleman; I am not. 
  
Compared to docile Americans, British and Continental Europeans, I am of South African birth and Greek and Boer extraction, and now the spiritual, if not the genetic, inheritor of the spirit of Wilhelm Tell; if others do not want to fight for the freedoms of themselves and their families, and fight the destruction of their countries and basic human decency, then I shall at least defend those that Switzerland might still have left. 
  
I have to shave every morning, and cannot look at that face if it were as smeared with the blood of innocents, as those politicians of ours who allowed CIA Torture Flights to land at some of our airports in transit from one US camp to another. 
  
May God Almighty fry all those lap-dog politicians in Hell. 
  
George

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Fonetic Fun...

It has often been pointed out that communication would be simpler if English spelling were not so unnecessarily difficult; for example, cough, plough, rough, through, and thorough. A gradual program of changes would wipe out these anomalies.

In the first year, 's' would be used instead of the soft 'c'. Sertainly sivil servants in a sities would reseive this news with joy. Then the hard 'c' could be replased by 'k' sinse both letters are pronounsed alike. Not only would this klear up konfusion in the minds of klerikal workers, but keyboards kould be made with one less letter. And English would look more like German.

There would be growing enthusiasm when, in the sekond year, it was announsed that the troublesome 'ph' would henseforth be written 'f'. This would make words like 'fotograf' twenty percent shorter to print.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible. Governments would enkourage the removal of double leters, whish have always been a deterent to akurate speling.

We would all agre that the horible mes of silent 'e's in the languag is disgrasful. Therefor we kould drop them and kontinu to read and writ as though nothing had hapend. By this tim it would be four years sins the skem began, and people would be reseptiv to steps such as replasing the'th' by 'z'. Perhaps zen ze funktion of 'w' kould be taken on by 'v', vitsh is , after al, half a 'w'.

Shortly after zis, ze unesesary 'o' kould be dropd from vords kontaining' ou'. Similar arguments vud of kors be aplid to ozer dombinations of leters.

Kontinuing zis proses yer after yer, ve vud eventuli hav a reli sensibl riten styl. After tventi yers zer vud be no mor trubls, difikultis, and everivun vud find it ezi to understand etsh ozer.

________________________________________________________________________

I had found that little article in a Readers Digest Magazine quite some time ago. Here's another one gotten from the same place.  I have always been fascinated by English, and will therefore probably bore you with more tidbits about the language ;)  By the way, why is Phonetic not spelled phonetically?

________________________________________________________________________

Eye Halve A Spelling Chequer

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.


As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rarely ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no 
Its letter perfect in it's weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.


-- Sauce unknown

Friday, February 13, 2009

Triskaidekaphobia

Today is Friday the 13th.  So many people are scared of this day, one of the reasons being that Jesus was crucified on a friday and his last supper seated 13.  And who was the 13th member to be sited at that supper?  None other than Judas of course, the one who betrayed Jesus and sent him to his death.

In Norse mythology, the god Odin was throwing a dinner party in Valhalla at his home.  He had invited 11 of his closest friends.  The god Loki crashed the party, bringing the total number of participants to 13.  In the legend, the god Balder tried to kick Loki out of the party and a fight started.  Balder died from an arrow tipped in mistletoe.


In Canada and the States (probably elsewhere as well, although I'm not sure of it) there is no 13th floor in tall buildings nor are there apartments numbered 13.  It's as if the number 13 doesn't exist.  Usually what would be 13 is called 12 b.  As if normal people don't realize that means 13!  Not only buildings, but try finding a numbered street 13, they skip it or give it a name such as Jones street.

In the States, they never made an F-13, they simply went straight to the F-14 Tomcat, go figure!

Another interesting tidbit involves the Hebrew calendar.  It's a lunisolar calendar and therefore needs to have a month added to it occassionally in order to keep the balance between the lunar and solar cycles.  The years with the 13th month are considered to be unnatural and therefore unlucky.  

Paraskevidekatriaphobia, fear of Friday the 13th, is probably the most widespread of superstitions.  There has even been a study done correlating traffic accidents on both Friday the 6th and Friday the 13th.  "The risk of hospital admission as a result of a transport accident may be increased by as much as 52%. Staying at home is recommended."   This according to the British Medical Journal.  

Because so many people are scared of this day, there are claims of millions of dollars in revenue lost due to people avoiding moving, travelling, lack of weddings etc.

Personally 13 has always been my lucky number, and Friday the 13th has consequently always been my luckiest day.  How about for you?  Do you hide away and hope nothing bad happens? 




Or do you embrace the day and enjoy it?

Monday, February 9, 2009

VIAGRA SPILL REVIVES LAKE MICHIGAN

Once-Cold and Torpid, Waterway Now Greatest of Great Lakes

A freighter containing 62,000 metric tons of popular impotence drug Viagra struck a reef and sank in Lake Michigan today. As a result, the once-frigid lake no longer dangles into Illinois and Indiana, but now spans majestically across northern Wisconsin. 

According to eyewitnesses, roughly 30 to 60 minutes after the ship's contents dissolved, the lake slowly but firmly began to push northwest toward Minnesota. Eventually, its swollen banks managed to poke aside Lake Superior, which cartographers said will lose its standing as the largest of the Great Lakes for the next four to six hours. 

Area residents were surprised by the sudden shift, but conceded Michigan was "like an entirely new lake." 

"For so many years that lake just, you know, sat there," said Martha Strop of Eau Claire, Wisc. "To be honest, I never even thought about it anymore. There wasn't much of a point. But now, well, this has changed our lives forever." 

Government officials, however, were more cautious. 

In Wisconsin, Gov. Jim Doyle declared a state of emergency, while in Minnesota, Gov. Tim Pawlenty declared: "Is Lake Michigan a threat, or is it just glad to see me?"

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

I hope "nobody" get's offended!

Tired of Being Isolated and Ignored, Continent Isn't Bloody Moving 

Sydney, 800 miles S. of Nova Scotia  

After what witnesses described as an all night blinder during which it kept droning on about how it was always being bloody ignored by the whole bloody world and would bloody well stand to do something about it, Australia this morning woke up to find itself in the middle of the North Atlantic. 


"Good Lord, that was a booze up," said a bleary-eyed Australian Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd, speaking from his residence at Kirribilli House, approximately 600 nautical miles east of Cape Hatteras, North Carolina. 

According to Australians and residents of several countries destroyed or lewdly insulted during the continent's nearly 7,000-mile saltwater stagger, the binge began just after noon yesterday at a pub in Brisbane, where several patrons were discussing Australia Day and the nation's general lack of respect from abroad. 

"It started off same as always; coupla fossils saying how our Banjo Patterson was a better poet than Walt Whitman, how Con the Fruiterer is funnier than Seinfeld, only they're Aussies so no one knows about 'em," recalled witness Kevin Porter. "Then this bloke Martin pipes up and says Australia's main problem is that it's stuck in Australia, and everybody says 'Too right!'" 

"Well, it made sense at the time," Porter added. 

By 2 a.m., powered by national pride and alcohol, the 3-million-square-mile land mass was barging eastward through the Coral Sea and crossing into the central Pacific, leaving a trail of beer cans and Chinese take-away in its wake. 

When dawn broke over the Northern Hemisphere, the continent suddenly found itself, not only upside down, but smack in the middle of the Atlantic, and according to most of its 19 million inhabitants, that's the way it's going to stay. 

                                                


"We sent troops to Afghanistan. You never hear about it. We have huge government scandals. You never hear about it. It's all 'America did this,' and 'Europe says that,'" exclaimed Perth resident Paul Watson. "Well, we're right in the thick of things now, so let's just see if you can you ignore us." 


Officials on both sides of the Atlantic conceded that would be difficult. "They broke Florida," said U.S. State Department spokesman Richard Boucher. "And most of Latin America is missing." 

Meanwhile, victims of what's already been dubbed the "Australian Crawl" are still shaking off the event. 

"Australia bumped into us at about midnight local time," said Hawaii governor Ben Cayetano. "They were very friendly — they always seem friendly — but they refused to go around unless we answered their questions. But the questions were impossible. 'Who is Ian Thorpe? Do you have any Tim Tams? What day is Australia Day?'" 

"Fortunately, somebody here had an Unimportant World Dates calendar and we aced the last one," Cayetano added. 

Panama, however, was not so lucky. 

"Australia came through here screaming curses at us to let them through," said Ernesto Carnal, who guards the locks at the entrance to the Panama Canal. "We said they would not fit, so they demanded to speak with a manager. When I go to find Mr. Caballos, they sneak the whole continent through." 

When Caballos shouted to the fleeing country that it had not paid, Australia "accidentally" backed up and took out every nation in the region, as well as the northern third of Venezuela. They then made up a cheery song about it.  Chavez was not amused!

By late morning today, however, not everyone in Australia was quite so blithe. "We've still got part of Jamaica stuck to Queensland," said Australian army commander Lt. Gen. Peter Cosgrove. "I think we might have declared war on it. I don't bloody remember. Maybe it's time to go home." 

Cosgrove, however, is not in the majority, and at press time, U.S., African, and European leaders were still desperately trying to negotiate for Australia's withdrawal. But the independent-minded Aussies were not making it easy. In a two-hour meeting at midday, Australian representatives listed their demands: immediate inclusion in the North Atlantic Treaty Organization, a permanent CNN presence in all 6 Australian states, a worldwide ban on hiring Paul Hogan, a primetime U.S. television contract for Australian Rules Football, and a 4,500-mile-long bridge between Sydney and Los Angeles. 

U.S. negotiators immediately walked out, calling the Australian Rules Football request "absurd."

Some history Part 3

"I see that the old flagpole still stands. Have your troops hoist the colors to its peak, and let no enemy ever haul them down." - Douglas MacArthur

Just a day or two before Munchkin and Silver met, she had pulled a knife on me and said she was going to kill me, and then she'd cut herself up till she bled to death. I didn't know what to do, so I just grabbed the knife out of her hand, grabbed her and held tight while she screamed and fought me off like a tiger. I just kept telling her I loved her, and somehow we'd fix what was wrong with us. I think it had taken 2 hours to get her calmed down, that was the scariest night of my life, and all I could think was "How much worse is this going to get before we can make it better?"

The weekend prior to that, she had broken her bed for the second time on return from her father's, in a rage at him for having been drunk all weekend again. Somehow, I just couldn't get too overly upset with her for that. 

I knew though that something had to be done. I also knew I wasn't a very good parent. What I didn't know was how to fix any of it. I knew too that I needed better parenting skills, but where do I go for that? My parents? I don't think so, I didn't get anything good from them to begin with obviously! The doctor's? Apparently not, as all they did was medicate us. I knew Munchkin and I needed help, but everything I did made things worse. She was now up to 100 mg of Serequil per dose, and I was at my wits end.

I asked Silver about getting help, but didn't really think he'd know as he didn't have kids, but that just goes to show how little I knew about him at that time.

I wish I had the vocabulary to explain all that Silver has taught me about first and foremost being a woman. Secondly, about liking who I am, and more importantly accepting it. He also taught me about being a parent, and about what it means to be a single mother (you'd be surprised how different that is from being a parent). And last, but most definitely not the least, what it means to be a lover! It's amazing how tied together these all are and yet how separate. I'm still learning in all these areas, and I'm sure I will be till I die, but at least now I know how to learn!

I think the biggest thing I have learned so far is that without love and respect for myself, I can not show it to anyone else, nor and more importantly, teach Munchkin how to love and respect herself or anyone else.

I seem to have gotten off track here a bit and yet at the same time, I haven't. Once Silver took it upon himself to teach us, he had me talk to Munchkins teacher and have her watch for changes in her behavior at school. I also had her watch for consistencies.

One of the first things Mme C noticed was Munchkins withdrawn, almost to the point of appearing sick, behavior every other Friday. Well that coincided with her visits to her father on the following Saturdays. Another thing Mme C made a note of was Munchkins being a bully to her and her classmates the following Mondays to Wednesdays or Thursdays. Her behavior in school became so predictable that Mme C had Munchkin assigned a "Big Sister" so she could spend an hour with her every week and get a lot of her frustrations off her chest.

Thanks to Silver, the school and I became a team in helping Munchkin learn to express herself in a beneficial manner.

After that, the only problem we really had was how whatever Munchkin would learn at home and school in the 2 weeks without her father, was completely undermined in the 2 days with him. It was 1 step forward, and sometimes 5 steps back. I must say, that was quite frustrating to say the least.

In case you didn't know, I have Munchkin in French Immersion because she was bored with school, getting her work done before the rest of the class, and would then become disruptive. Since regular English classes were too easy, I made the decision to transfer her to French. Well, unfortunately, that is starting to become too easy for her as well. When it comes to the sciences and math's, she is still finished long before her classmates and she begins to distract the others from their work, but at least the teacher understands this and has her do some French reading lessons.

After one particular weekend with her father, Munchkin went back to school on the following Monday, looked Mme C in the eye and said, "My father says French is for stupid people and I'm not supposed to listen to you anymore!" Mme C just let it go at that, left Munchkin to her own devices for the day, and let me know what happened. That got her a much-deserved smack when she got home from school, and of course it took the rest of that week as well as the next week to re-train her.

That all happened in the beginning of Grade 2, by the end of the school year, Munchkin had learned so much about her father, that she realized how much better off she was without her father in her life.

Backtracking again, (yes I'm bad at keeping things chronological), I should remember to tell you that the very first thing Silver had me do was wean Munchkin off the Seroquel which in turn ended her breathing problems, not so surprising I suppose! Then he threw out my Amytriptiline and I thought he was nuts until I started to get better of course!

It was last May/June that Munchkin decided her father was no longer part of her life. That came 1 year after Silver entered our lives. Now one year without Munchkin's father we have indeed become a family. Yes Munchkin is still an 8 year old, acting as 8 year olds do, but without all the previous drama. She and I are no longer a dysfunctional family, we're finally happy!

Thank you Silver, I know I don't say it enough!

*PS

Remember that I wrote these over 2 years ago :-)*

Munchkin is now a thriving 10 year-old-going-on 30 year old...lol.  The biggest regret she has is that Silver is not her actual father.  As a matter of fact, her biological father calls once a year to talk to her and convince her to go to his house.  Usually she refuses to take the phone, this time however, she didn't, she actually talked to him!  Guess what she said!?!

If you guessed that she told him not to call anymore, that she has a real Dad now, you'd be right.

There Nobody, that's the kick-in-the-teeth that the ex got from Silver, and I dare say, it couldn't have been a better one!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Some history, part 2

“Too often we give children answers to remember rather than problems to solve.” – Roger Lewin

How about if I go back to the beginning of all this!

I married my second husband when Munchkin was 11 months old because I believed him when he said he’d kill me if I didn’t. To make a long story short, our life together was fraught with abuse, most of which Munchkin was witness to.

I had him arrested for the second and last time when he threatened Munchkins life, and when she started to cry he said, and I quote “You’re nothing but a fucking little slut you bitch, and if you don’t shut up soon I’ll hit you so hard you’ll never make another sound again!”

That was the last straw. Prior to that he had never said anything nor done anything against her. It was always against me, and I thought I could handle that.

Munchkin was just 3 ½ at the time and suffered terrible nightmares after that. She would wake up screaming, and once calmed down enough to talk, she’d tell me what she had dreamt. One was much like the next, always with the same theme. I won’t go into the detail she did, but they always involved her father breaking into the house and making her watch him kill and dismember me in one way or another. Needless to say, it didn’t take long for her to start acting out.

Soon the divorce was finalized and despite what had happened, the judge ordered supervised visitation every other Saturday. The day before she was to see her father and for a few days after, Munchkins behavior was terrifying to say the least. So I started to take her to a child psychologist. After a few meetings the psychologist had a co-worker who was licensed to prescribe medication to come in and observe the next few sessions. This led to Munchkin being diagnosed with ADHD and Bi-polar disorder and was put on 25 mg of Seroquil 2 times/day. At the time, I did not know that Seroquil had not been tested for use on children under the age of 18, and here my little girl who was just about to turn 4 was put on it.

Because visitations with her father were supervised, the judge was still monitoring what was going on with the help of a family conciliation mediator. She told the judge that the visits seemed to be going well so she suggested that after 6 months visitations should become unsupervised and be from Saturday 10 am to Sunday’s 6 pm, and because I still had a standing restraining order against him, the exchange of “the child” should take place at the home of one of my ex’s brothers. I was to drop Munchkin off, leave and then my ex’s new wife was to pick her up. With just the opposite happening on Munchkins return to my care.

With every visitation Munchkins behavior became worse. She was soon put on a steroid inhaler because she was beginning to have a hard time breathing as well. Not only that, but her Seroquil was doubled to being 50 mg 2 times a day.

Sadly I didn’t question the psychologists/psychiatrists in regards to Munchkins care. I later found out that 98% of the children these 2 women care for medically were diagnosed with ADD, ADHD, Bi-Polar disorder, Aspergers disease and so much more. It seems there is no such thing as normal children anymore. The funny thing is, when I was her age, just barely 30 years ago now, these diseases didn’t even exist. Children that displayed any personality, were just kids being kids.

Munchkin was started on the Serequil at roughly 4 years of age and at 4 and a half she was given the inhaler to help her breathing. Somewhere around 5 months of non-supervised visitations Munchkin started to get violent. She broke her toys and would push and hit her friends. This culminated in her breaking her bed and her Serequil being upped once again, she was now on 75 mg twice daily at 5 ½ years of age. Her behavior started to stabilize, meaning she wasn’t getting worse, but she wasn’t getting any better either.

Part of the mediators suggestion to the judge about visitation was that after a suitable trial period of unsupervised visits, providing nothing “bad” was happening and my ex was still with his 3rd wife, visitations during summer holidays could be held for a week at a time. I grudgingly agreed to this. These extended visitations also included x-mas holidays and long weekends. I didn’t like it, and had my misgivings, but like I said I did agree to it.

Munchkin was still acting out prior to and after visitations with her father, but the year she turned 7 she started her week long visitations during summer. Little did I know, but it wasn’t going to be pleasant to say the least.

Backtracking just a bit, I had met Silver that same May, and later introduced Munchkin to him in June. I suppose neither of us will ever truly understand why he didn’t cut and run on the spot, but he didn’t, he stayed! When he was at my place for the first time, and saw the way I was allowing Munchkin to behave, and my phone never stopping with it’s incessant ringing, not to mention my mother showing up out of the blue, he saw me literally fall apart at the seams. 

I guess he realized that he was the only one who could help me. In that 1 day at my place, he saw that everyone, including Munchkin’s doctors were doing us more harm than good. I, myself, was on a rather high daily dose of antidepressants that was leaving me at a disadvantage for being able to think clearly, but that’s no excuse for how terrible I let the situation get to be. I am the one who trusted blindly, I was happy to keep my head in the sand and blame the world around me for the way my life had become.

Monday, February 2, 2009

A little bit of past history

I'm posting this from an old blog of mine, so keep in mind that this is 2.5 years old.  I think I'll be doing this as a series, as that's how it makes most sense, even if it's not necessarily in chronological order:

Well to be honest, my daughter used to be the world’s biggest brat! She has broken a couple of beds (consequently slept without one for a while), and has pulled knives on me wishing I was dead. I took her to a child psychologist, who of course prescribed heavy-duty medication, Siroquel to be precise.

Thanks to the new man in my life, these problems are going away. She is no longer on those meds, and nor does she throw temper tantrums or break things. She hasn't had a nightmare in god knows how long either. Knives are now only used for helping with meals (exactly what they're meant for). So suffice it to say that doc's don't know as much as they pretend to. Sometimes it's like Silver says, if you don't discipline properly, you've got war in your home with the child being the general and the parent being the private. 

Thanks to Silver, I am now the general and my daughter is the private with no say in what happens. She may still gripe and complain as all children do, but she now does as she's told without fighting about it. She also even respects me now, and the only time I really have a problem with her is when she comes home from her fathers’ house after being there for a weekend with him.

I just wish that my parents knew how to raise children. As long as they are alive I'll always be their daughter. The trouble is that they don't like me. Never really have I don't think. 

I suppose this is a word of advice to parents’ everywhere. Please don't put your children down. My mother has called me the devil's spawn for as long as I can remember, and now she doesn't understand why I don't want her to come over, nor can she understand why I don't go there, (even for gatherings). She had even told me how, when I was about 12 or 13, she tried to abort me just 2.5 weeks before I was due to be born. It has left a lot of psychological scars that will never heal, because she doesn't acknowledge that any of this happened, let alone apologize for it.

I'm not looking for help here, I have all the help I need in Silver. He is teaching me to deal with my problems as well as how to deal with my daughter.

Friday, January 30, 2009

Do you own your pets, or do they own you?

People around here have been telling me all my life that dog's and cat's have no emotions, and that they weren't good for anything other than protection, herding cattle or sheep, or in the case of cat's, being mouser's.  These people just don't get it.  They don't understand what having dog or cat is all about.

Yes those aspects of dog's and cat's are good, but these people obviously haven't ever had a meaningful relationship with someone of the four-legged variety.  

Let's take Silverfish's dog Lucifer for instance.  He's a Doberman whom Silver "adopted" in July of 2007, he was 7 months old at the time.  Silver never adopted him, Lucifer adopted Silver!  He has since adopted me as well.  Quite frankly I think the mutts name should be Loki, not Lucifer.  Like, if he's to be named for a god, it may as well be for the god of mischief.

Let me explain.  Last summer, Lucifer found out that he can trip people in sandals, specifically those known as "flip-flops" or "thongs".  He'll sneak up behind someone, and just as they're taking a step, he'll step down on the sandal, making it impossible to walk.  Trust me, I know this from vast experience!  

Another thing this boy's learned is how to start a water fight.  Unfortunately, he always starts them indoors!  He takes great pleasure in watching me pour myself a glass of water.  Once I put the water jug back in the fridge and start to walk away, he'll come up behind me and smash his forehead into my cup splashing water all over me.  And then he laughs!  Oh yes, Lucifer has a great laugh!  I swear this dog came from the Jim Carey movie, "The Mask".  Remember that part where Jim's dog puts on the mask and bites that criminal in the ass?  That would be the same expression and laugh that Lucifer has everytime he plays a prank on someone.

God forbid you should put a glass of milk or a flavored coffee down on the coffee table and take your eyes off of it for more than half a second!  Yep, that 140 lb little bugger will drink it right from under your nose, and then when you get mad at him for it, he laughs! 

He takes his chewed up wrecked toys and put them on your head.  (That's Silver's fault.  We buy tobacco and roll our own cigarette's, Silv started this thing with putting the tobacco lid on Lucifer's head and calling it a "Silly Hat".)  So now he does this with his toys and then laughs about it.

Not only does this boy play practical jokes on his "owners", but he's a terrible flirt and perverted to boot.  I have a neighbor girl who has some rather good looking female friends.  As I get along with all of them, they come over to visit occassionally.  Well, the better looking of the girls get a huge kick out of it.  When these girls come over, Lucifer will give them a little love nip on their butts.  He gooses them!  Where do you think he learned that trick?  Then, when they've managed to get into the house and sit on the couch, Lucifer sits there beside them, and tries to stick his nose down the girls shirt.  He then proceeds to nip her tit giving her a hickie!  The girls laugh their heads off when he does this.  He gives them such love-struck-puppy eyes it's disgusting!  

Ok, so I've gotten really far off the topic of the day here.  I had started this off by asking if you own your pet or if he/she owns you.  Well, dammit, it's obvious, isn't it?  Your pet (for lack of a better generic term) owns you, plain and simple.  After all, he/she says it's time to go for a walk, or it's time for a pee break, or it's time for food, it's always something, right!?!  Well, who take them for walks?  Who let's them out for pee?  Who brings whom the food?  Who cleans the litter box?  Not the pet, it's the so called owner!

Do you think these critter's are going to let their owners know that they are truly the master's in this master/slave relationship?  NO they won't!  Why won't they?  Let me ask you this, if you were in a relationship with another person and that person thinks he/she owns you, but it's really the other way around, would you tell him/her and open his/her eyes to reality, or would you just let the gravy train keep rolling along smoothly?  I know what I'd do, I'll leave the train roll and let the fool keep his delusions.  And that's the same opinion that our furry little friends have.

So tell me, who is it that truly has the inferior mind?  The human who is deluded into thinking he's the master, or the pet who knows exactly how much can be gotten away with?  Humans think they have the superior mind, after all, a human can reason things out.  Well, excuse me people, how can Lucifer have such a sense of humor or such a perverted attitude when the mood strikes him if he has no capabilities of reason?

Lucifer is only one example.  I've known a dog who knew she was seeing herself in a mirror.  If her owner gave her a haircut, she'd hang her head in shame as she walked past a mirror.   BUT if she went to a proper groomer to get her hair cut she'd prance and strut in front of the mirror.  That takes reasoning!

A cat I used to have always knew exactly where I had pain and would curl herself up against that spot and start to purr.  Her warmth and the vibrations of her purrs always helped ease the pain of the affected area.  That takes reasoning!

I'll let Silv tell you about his friend Pauly, but that bird had a hell of a sense of humor as well, and that takes reasoning!

You have to be able to reason to be able to understand things.  It's not just instinct.

The only critters on this planet that are evil or malicious for the sake of it, are humans.  Now explain to me how that's reasonable.  Please explain to me how humans are the "better" species, I just can't see it!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

I wonder if I have enough to read?

Ok, so I've printed up Hitler Born at Versailles (324 pgs), Catholic Orangemen of Togo (218pgs), Mind Control in the 21st Century (103pgs), and also Inside Laurel Canyon (88pgs).   That's 733 pages of information for my overlogged brain to absorb.  Not to mention all the reading I do here.  Now if I don't get some real understanding about the world, I'll have to say that there is something seriously wrong with me!  

With all that printing, only 40 pages of f#$%-up's that needed to be reprinted.  If you're wondering why I admitted to that, it's 'cause Silv will call me on it if I don't first...lol.  Besides, if one can't laugh at oneself, who then can one laugh at?  Oh yeah, there were also about 6 pages or so that I had punched the holes on the wrong side in the Laurel Canyon book.  Oh well, pobody's nerfect! *big cheesy grin*

Now it's  off to do some reading!

Monday, January 26, 2009

How well do you know the map of the Middle East?

A friend sent me this link via e-mail.  I went to it, and found that even though I'm reading a lot about these countries, I didn't really know where it was that they were in location to each other.  So, I'm challenging you to go to Rethinking Schools and take the test.  Yep, I've taken it over and over again.  You don't get a score, you aren't timed, all info is strictly for yourself.  I just find it a good way to learn a little more geography.  I hope it helps you to learn a little more as well! :)

Friday, January 23, 2009

Opposition of Occupation and other ramblings

Why is it, that when one country invades and occupies another, the victims, i.e. the people who live in the occupied country, are called terrorists when they oppose the occupation? 

For myself, I'd appreciate being able to oppose an occupying force without being given such a horrible label. Quite frankly, the way I see it is that the groups doing the invading are indeed the terrorists. That would make Canada, the U.S., Britain, Oz and all the other countries currently in the Middle East enforcing war in fact terrorists. It's a label that suits them well, and one I hate being part of, as I'm a Canuck.

I don't know if you ever watched Star Trek, The Next Generation, but the evil Borg depict these occupying countries quite nicely. These countries that are trying to take control of the oil and everything else out there, have the "Borg" mentality. What I mean is that the Borg, when occupying a spaceship or world, would say, "Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated." The people in Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, and Pakistan will eventually be assimilated into the occupying countries, after all, their homeland is being occupied by people right alongside them.

Let's take Canada for instance. In order for people of other races to get along here in Canada, they have to learn the language. This poses a problem for a lot of people, as Canada is a bilingual country, speaking both English and French. Now most newcomers can get along if they learn English, but what happens if they learn enough English to get by, and then are left to live in the province of Quebec? Quebec is predominantly French, these immigrants would be screwed, because now they'd have to learn yet another language. If they don't learn the language, they won't be able to get much in the way of jobs unless they miraculously are able to find a place to live that is predominantly of their nationality. It's easy for the Chinese, Italians, and East Indian's as most major cities here in Canada have such communities as China Town, Little Italy, or Little India, but not so for those from the Middle East.

I feel for these people who have no place to go, but really folks, should they be forced to go anywhere in the first place? This is their land they're being kicked out of and made refugees from. We are the invaders, we are the terrorists, and we are the ones guilty of war crimes. Perhaps not directly, but by god we are by proxy! Our countries are doing this to them, or at the very least are allowing such atrocities to happen. None of our countries citizens are telling our governments to get out of the Middle East and mean it. If we were, our governments would have to listen and would therefore get out of there, or face the consequences. What are the consequences? Well that's easy, it would mean that they wouldn't be re-voted into office, it could mean a vote of no confidence forcing an election in a non-election year. Trouble is, would the new government voted in be any better? Answer to that, probably not. The Puppet Master’s would ensure that new puppets were groomed and ready to be put in place.

Sure, a new government may get the people out of the war they're involved in, but it sure as hell won't help to put a stop to what the Israelites are doing in Pakistan. We’d still be supporting Israel, because we are its minions. Jews are the Puppet Master’s. Jews own and control the banks, the banks own and control the government. Without the banks, there’s no flow of money, how can the government pay for things (or get paid) without money? They can’t. So they follow the money, and that comes straight from the banks. Oh yes, we the people pay our taxes and believe that’s what pays for the government to exist. But, does it really? When we get our paychecks where does the money go? Into the bank. Where do the taxes go that get taken off our checks? Into the bank. Who moves that money into the government coffers? The bank. Who owns the bank? The Jews. Therefore, for whom do we really work? The Jews! Make no mistake, the bank, ergo the Jews, get their cut for every transaction made. The Jews get our money to support their terrorization any and every conceivable way that they can, regardless of what you want. There is no getting around it, short of disappearing off the grid.  

I believe Nobody knows what that’s all about!

The only other option is revolt. Start another Civil War. That’ll put paid to some problems, start other problems, and in the end, the Jews will still own the banks. So saying, it’s no solution at all. 

We are sheeple, no matter what we do, no matter how we may try to fight back, eventually we will once again be led by our noses to the slaughter house.

So why is it that we call those who are defending themselves and their homes terrorists? Well in my opinion, it’s because we’re just too damned blind to see what’s right in front of our faces. And that is the plain and simple fact that we are only following orders. Orders given to us by our governments, which are in turn given to them by the Puppet Master’s. Oh, we may not see it as orders, we’re just following what the media portrays, but the media portrays that which it’s allowed to portray, rarely portraying the truth.

What a bloody copout!